Inappropriate labels

We read it in the Daily Mail. 80% of wine sold in the UK is bought by women and women buy according to how attractive the label is.

Now first of all, we can't visualize all those blokes leaving it to the ladies to buy their booze. Every time we have entered a wine shop we were mostly alone or in the company of others of our sort and 'we' are a pudgy middle-aged bloke. Whenever a lady has been present and has sought directions (meaning advice) from the sales person (usually a chap) we love listening in, but we have never observed a Shiela actually selecting a wine with an obviously cuetsy label. Such labels do exist but they are abominations and we suspect no one is fooled.

Having said that, there are lots of inappropriate labels. These often involve dogs. why anyone would think that wine has any affinity to dogs? We know almost ever vigneron has a dog but we assume that is because they lead a lonely life or that they need the dog to keep pests away. They should keep the dogs in the background. No city-dweller wants to buy a wine that might have been fertilized by dog-poo or otherwise come into contact with animals of any kind  - unless they are from Hampstead where dog ownership is obligatory.

There is another type clearly directed at men (assuming men like Heavy Metal). Here are a few inappropriate labels we have collected. We don't think any of then would have appealed to any woman and probably not to any man although the bum is quite extraordinary, we thing you will have to admit. Extraordinary enough to buy the wine?